How to Stay Fit, Fab, and Fearless After a Toxic Divorce

People have different ways of handling divorce and coping up to the situation. Although this phase is one of the most challenging events in life, divorce can still be viewed in either an optimistic or negative way, depending on how the involved couple feels about it. I remember someone told me she’s moving to a different home now that she’s been divorced from her ex.

Thinking of how stressful it seems to deal with that kind of situation, I felt sorry for her. Then I get surprised when she said that I shouldn’t be sorry about it because she actually prayed for it to happen and it just feels so good to be free again. In that sense, we come to realize that divorce doesn’t really have to be viewed as an “ending” but a fresh start of new beginnings and changes in life.

Going through a toxic divorce, it’s okay to feel busted and broke or go stressed over tons of discussion with a family lawyer regarding your properties, child custody, and other related issues. These factors can greatly affect your physical, mental, and emotional health and it’s alright. Because at the end of the day, this phase will open the doors of new opportunities but it takes courage and bravery to stand up from a failed marriage and embrace what’s left for you. Remember healing is a process so you have to work on the following tips below if you are battling with this phase and you have no idea on how to get the hell out of it.

Tip #1: Embrace the pain for the last time.

To embrace the pain wouldn’t mean that you’re weak because you can’t fight the pain and let go of everything that’s keeping you from being happy again. To embrace the pain would mean that you’re strong enough because you’re not afraid to face what’s hurting you. As I’ve said, healing is a process and the first step that you can do at your weakest phase is to lean into the pain, shed as many tears as you can, and squeeze the injuries in your soul.

But you don’t let yourself live in the pain forever. It takes time, yes. You have to decide that you’ll be doing all these for the last time when you feel like you’re about to get mended and you feel like you’ve given more than enough to let go.     

Tip #2: Kiss the sweetest goodbye to the past.

You have created uncountable memories, future plans, and late-night talks with your ex for sure. But those are too beautiful memories that deserve the sweetest farewell. Sometimes, they’re the beautiful memories that always come to end and you have to take it. You know you can’t move forward if you keep on carrying all these baggage so learn to cut them off piece by piece till you feel the lightness of your load. This stage gives your body the time to rest and recover from emotional trauma.

Tip #3: Say hello to new beginnings.

After throwing away all the bits of memories, the happiest and the saddest, it’s time to welcome the new chapter of your life without a ring that glitters on your finger. This could be the most exciting and challenging part at the same time. This is the phase when you have to focus on yourself more and regenerate all the lost energies when you were in the middle of hopelessness and messed-up moments. Ask for strength and courage to embrace new opportunities that will give you hope, peace of mind, and genuine happiness in the long run.   

Tip #4: Pamper yourself.

You’ve stressed yourself too much and if there’s one thing that can heal a body from severe heartbreak, it’s regaining your physical, mental, and emotional strength. What you need, in simpler words, is complete nourishment. Always eat the right way and perform a balanced exercise every day. Include exercises that connect your mind and body such as yoga and other forms of meditation. Focus on your fitness mantra and don’t get yourself distracted. It would also help if you hire a personal trainer to guide you.

In line with your fit and fab journey, another secret is getting enough sleep. Relieve your stress by pampering yourself and getting busy with new-found interests such as gardening, reading or writing a book, playing the old sports, and other recreational stuff.   

Tip #5: Reunite with your family and friends.

You surely missed a lot of important people in your life while you were going through difficulties and major sorrows. As part of the healing process, you need to reconstruct your lost connections with your parents, siblings, friends, and most of all, your children. You may not hear it from them but your struggles are their struggles too. So, spend time with these people and learn to find a new home in their presence.