How to talk to a close person suffering from eating disorders?

The treatment of eating disorders is extremely difficult for people affected by these diseases. They need both strong motivation for treatment and support from their loved ones in order to sustain their recovery from the disease. People with eating disorders, especially those who are aware of the seriousness of their condition and who are considering treatment, often tend to isolate themselves from the environment. 

They also often seek understanding in numerous online forums dedicated to nutrition disorders. Unfortunately, on the Internet you can find forums such as pro ana or pro mia, which gather people who recognise anorexia and bulimia as lifestyles rather than diseases. They offer support and understanding, but also reduce motivation for treatment. That is why it is important to offer help if you have a sick person among your loved ones.

What to do if a person close to us suffers from eating disorders? Surely you must not avoid such a person, or pretend that the problem does not exist. Talking only about trivial and unimportant topics such as "we have a beautiful autumn this year" and withdrawing from the conversation every time the topic comes close to dangerous topics causes further alienation of the sick person. We should also refrain from making hasty judgments such as "she is guilty of herself" or "these anorexia and bulimia are just fanaberies". 

Not being psychologists or therapists, not experiencing personally what eating disorders they are, we are not able to fully understand what a sick person goes through. Let's try not to speak in anger because of what we hear. Distorted course of thinking, distorted image of one's own character, dominating the mind with food, hunger strike, weight loss, low self-esteem - these are just a few of the problems faced by anorexics and bulimics every day. The most difficult to understand is that in reality, these diseases do not result from egoism or from a vain desire to be beautiful. Although they focus on food, they are really only a reflection of much deeper problems.

When talking about illness, let's not ask "why? The causes of eating disorders are complex, multifactorial. The sick person very often does not realize the real reasons, often denies that the problem exists at all. Do not try to concentrate the conversation only on the disease. After all, every anorexic or bulimic woman is a living person who has personality, identity, likes and dislikes, and views deep under diets, food and slimming. Let us not deprive her of the possibility of being a normal girl, talking only about her illness. Anorexia and bulimia take full control over the lives of their victims, so by showing support, let's do it to the person, not the disease.

People with eating disorders are very sensitive to their appearance, so when talking to them we should refrain from making comments such as "you look much healthier", "you do not look like anorexics/bulimics", "what is important is the interior of the person, not his appearance". Such words, although spoken kindly and honestly, can be interpreted as a message "you look fat" and make you want to lose weight further. Another topic that we should avoid when talking to a person suffering from eating disorders is diet. "If you wanted to lose weight, why didn't you follow a diet and sign up for a gym? - Just as an alcoholic in rehab is not offered a "just a weaker drink", in the case of anorexics and bulimics you should not direct their thinking towards food and weight loss issues.

Since there are so many topics that should be avoided, what should we talk about? It is not possible to provide a list of safe and recommended topics. We should start by listening. Although what people with eating disorders say may not make sense to us, sometimes it's just a great relief to talk. It is a good idea to draw attention away from eating and losing weight after meals - so that the sick person has no chance to wonder how many calories he or she has just eaten and what he or she could do to get rid of them quickly. It is worthwhile to broaden your knowledge of eating disorders so that you can understand the sick person better, but you should not try to play the role of an expert when talking. If you do, it is definitely better to encourage you to visit a nutrition specialist.

Talking and showing support to a person with eating disorders is difficult, requires empathy, tact, more than once just iron nerves. However, it is always worth taking the effort and talking. Support provided by a loved one may prove to be the best motivation for treatment.

Author Bio

Hello Readers !! Natalie and Caitlyn Bell are the founders of Healtholine, They started Healtholine to provide a platform where they could share informative articles related to health, fitness, beauty, weight loss etc Natalie is a featured author at various authoritative rb_blog in the health and fitness industry. Connect with both sisters to know more.